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HOW TO FIND YOURSELF

For those that wonder, I will tell you right now:  you’re not going to find yourself at the bottom of the lost and found box.  Finding yourself doesn’t work that way because you are not something that can be lost.  The more we tell ourselves we are lost, the harder we become to find.  Let’s change this perspective to one that makes it easier for us to heal the part of ourselves that has been hidden.  Here are 

The first step in discovering yourself is to recognize that you are not lost. Lost implies that it was something you had and you forgot where you placed it, you don’t know where it is, or you misplaced it.  Or you unknowingly dropped it or left it somewhere on your travels.  We use the word “lost” in so many different ways.  We often say we lost a friend or a loved one, when they have left their physical bodies.  Friends and loved ones are not actually lost.  We know where they are. The part of you that you think is lost is not tangible enough to be lost. The part of you that is lost belongs to your spirit, is an energy belonging to your soul. 

Just like you learned to listen to all the other voices, you can learn to listen to the voice inside of you that is the real you.  The “you” that you think is lost can never be lost,it can be buried and hidden, but not lost.  When we say it is lost, we suggest it might not be found.  This is not true and can trick us into giving up easier.  

We are not lost from ourselves.  We just think we are. It feels like we are, because we think we are.  Our thoughts manifest in our emotions.  But, everywhere you look, there you are! You are not lost.  Implying that we have to find ourselves or have lost ourselves gives our power away.  The reality is that we are right here, just buried behind years of programming, false beliefs, ego, etc.  These are the obstacles that stand between us and our true self.  Obstacles to be removed to reveal ourselves.  Obstacles to be explored to discover ourselves.  We are not lost, we are only buried, hiding or scared.  Our real voice is more accessible than we think.

The second step is to recognize that our anger, anxiety, bitterness, depression, fear and various other mental health concerns are all symptoms.  These symptoms are not happening to us, they are happening for us.  They are not in cahoots with the universe, out to get us.  They are our body’s way of communicating to us when we are out of alignment with our true self.  Our emotions are communicating to us where we are out of alignment with our potential of joy, love and peace.  When we ignore or bury these emotions, we create distance from our inner voice that is communicating to us.

The third step is to identify the triggers that cause the above symptoms.  What triggers our ego to react and go on the defense?  What is it trying to protect?  Is it protecting outdated programming?  Traditions?  Long held false beliefs?  What is keeping us in fight or flight mode with our emotions on overdrive?  

Learning to identify what happens just  before you are feeling a negative emotion is necessary when discovering more about yourself.   Recognizing these triggers allows you to respond instead of react to them.  When you see them coming and have a strategic response, you can change the outcome of the situation.   When you change the outcome based on what is best for you, you become more aligned with your true self.  

Many of us try to avoid, deny, hide or run from our negative emotions.  This creates a disconnect between us and our true self.  Working with our emotions is how to reveal the layers blocking us.  Layers form each time we avoid, deny, hide or run from our emotions.  The next time you experience an emotion, try embracing it.  Feel into it.  Ask it what it is trying to tell you.  Consider what preceded the emotion as that is likely the trigger.  Then thank it for communicating with you, for showing up to tell you something you needed to know.  A positive emotion may be showing you how to be happy.  A negative emotion may be showing you what you are holding onto instead of releasing. 

Step four is to feel the emotions of joy, love and peace.  Lean into those emotions.  How do you feel when you are embracing joy, love and peace?  How is it different from when you are experiencing negative emotions such as anger, anxiety and fear?  Explore this as long as you need to.  Notice how much better joy, love and peace feel.  

For starters,these emotions have a higher vibration and are much lighter than negative emotions.   Negative emotions are dense and heavy.  They weigh us down with their dark energy.  Feel the difference by tuning into each emotion and examining how you are feeling.  Get to really know your emotions so that you can begin to understand what they are communicating to you. They are part of your inner guidance system, but we have been deprogrammed from listening to them.

Note the emotions that feel better.  It is likely the higher vibrating ones.  The one’s closest to unconditional love and furthest from hate.  These emotions feel better because they are more aligned with your true self.  Your true self is meant to resonate at the frequency of joy, love and peace.  

Step five is knowing that to become more aligned with your true self, set the intention to only engage with actions and thoughts that feel like the emotions of joy, love and peace.  Think thoughts that are this vibration.  There is less smoke and mirrors this way.  Less trickery an more authenticity.  Act as if there is nothing to hide.  Take action that represents this vibration.  Respond instead of react in this vibration. We have the ability to create with our thoughts and actions.  What others think of us is none of our business so create the life YOU love!

Act as if you are joy, love and peace.  

Ta Da!  Just like magic – there you be!  See?  You were in there all along.  You are not lost.  You don’t need to be found. Intend for your actions and thoughts to be aligned with joy, love and peace, and there you will be in all your glory.

Disclosure

These blogs are written from my personal perspective.  I have over thirty years of experience investigating, counseling, assessing and understanding the nature of humans.  I look forward to creating a connection with you and sharing reciprocal positive experiences, comments and feedback about your life experiences and opportunities for growth.  Please feel free to comment below.  Positive comments only please.